What does it mean to no longer fight for something I would've easily taken a bullet for? I am not totally sure at this moment considering this feeling is just hours old.
Sweet Mary was making a 4th of July dinner for our family tonight. BBQ, Brats you know the usual factory farmed animal stuff and she looked at me and said "you probably won't eat any of this" but does Derrick want some? I said sure. I was relieved that my food choices were recognized but at what cost? I couldn't enjoy the food prepared from a place of love.
A place of love. To speak from a place of love, to cook from a place of love, to live from a place of love negates the negativity of the words, food, and life. The industrial food system I still choose to not be a part of with my money or energy but I also choose to sit with the idea of eating industrial food when it is prepared with love. What does that mean? I am not totally sure at this moment.
What I do know from the last few hours is that to let go of fear and anger of anything only allows more space for love. A heavy burden is lifted. I wonder if letting go of all fear and anger is possible? If so, what do I fight for, what do I believe in, how do I demonstrate my individualism, how do I relate to people in a social setting, who do I get mad it, etc... Why do I feel that being angry/fearful towards someone or something is what defines me?
Yes, fear and anger are coupled together on purpose because you can't have one without the other.
angry at the food industry:fearful of the manipulation
I am no longer choose to angry at the food industry. It is a system that is created to serve a purpose. It is a system I choose not to be part of and it is a system I choose to no longer be angry or fearful at. To let go of this anger and fear that I have been carrying feels empty.